The Depolarizing of America

Our nation needs healing dialogues—especially now!

In the wake of the coronavirus, many of the issues dividing us as a nation and world—such as politics, race, class, gender, climate change, globalism, and religion—have only been magnified, and although the U.S. Surgeon general has called for an end to bickering and partisanship, it is unclear to what extent this will take effect. What is clear, however, is that safe, mindfully structured dialogues are imperative if we are to salvage our republic and the democratic principles on which it is built.

The Depolarizing of America is the culmination of years of effort to promote safe, mindfully structured dialogues in homes, offices, classrooms, and community centers. It is an attempt to “give away” the time-tested skills and methods with which the author, Kirk Schneider, has intimate experience, to a range of both laypersons and professionals; people who yearn to socially heal. The book begins with personal observations about our polarized state, both within the United States (and by implication) the world. It follows up with a reflection on how the sense of awe toward life—issuing in part from America’s founding spirit—can serve as a counter to this polarized state. It concludes with practical strategies centered on dialogue. These strategies translate awe-based sensibilities, including humility and wonder toward life, to a rediscovery of one another, a rediscovery of our potential to shape and revitalize our times. As a follow up to Schneider’s groundbreaking book, The Polarized Mind, The Depolarizing of America is an essential read for those who are striving for social healing and positive collective change.

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Reviews

Praise for The Depolarizing of America: A Guidebook for Social Healing

With The Depolarizing of America, Kirk Schneider has created a remarkable process for helping to rebuild our democracy one relationship at a time, from the level of ordinary citizens to that of public leaders.  The ‘Experiential Democracy Dialogue’ is a gift to a nation that badly needs healing.

William J. Doherty, PhD, is a professor of Family Social Science at the University of Minnesota and co-founder of Braver Angels


Once again, Kirk Schneider has challenged us to claim our humanity or ignite our own self-imposed psychological and physical demise. It is extremely important to note that in the face of the worldwide coronavirus pandemic, much of the United States has become more explicitly polarized. The Depolarizing of America: A Guidebook for Social Healingprovides relevant historical contexts that spawned much of the divisiveness of today, as well as a blueprint for optimal engagement in bridging those differences. I applaud Schneider’s clarity in centering the “fear” that divides us. I am reminded of the insightful quote from the character, ‘Fear,’ from Pixar’s moving 2015 film, Inside/Outside. “Alright, we did not die today! I’d call that an unqualified success.” However, should we not expect more in determining the “success” of humanity? Should we be so bold as to determine that the success of humanity is not just living yet how we live? Kirk’s timely work contributes to our capacity to raise up other emotions and ways of being that are necessary to balance “fear” in promoting civility and collective sanity.  I, for one, am counting on the complex-simplicity of the experiential democracy dialogues that Schneider is inviting us to engage in for the sake of humanity; to do otherwise is a frightening thought!

Theopia Jackson, PhD, Chair, Clinical Psychology Program, Saybrook University;
President, Association of Black Psychologists


In The Depolarizing of America: A Guidebook for Social Healing, Schneider presents a brilliant analysis of dogmatic mindsets that bring noxious effects to the world.  In delineating the psychological components that operate beneath polarized minds, Schneider highlights the role and function of awe in developing wakefulness, mindfulness and togetherness in recuperating from social malaise. Schneider’s work is promising, illuminating, and thought provoking.His exegsis is of existential significance as it presents a remarkable exploration of our global entrapment and addresses our ontological angst in a world surrounded by sundry manifestations of unrest, tension, turmoil, and bitterness.

Sayyed Mohsen Fatemi, PhD, Adjunct Faculty, York University, Canada;
Author of The Psychology of Inner Peace (Heartfulness), Cambridge University Press


Kirk Schneider’s ‘Guidebook for Social Healing’ provides a valuable tool in our quest to depolarize America, starting with ourselves. As someone who practices what he preaches by leading depolarization workshops, Dr. Schneider is able to insightfully share with readers his awe-inspired approach to depolarization. During Braver Angels events, I have witnessed the way Dr. Schneider brings people together in the spirit of curiosity, and—as a member of Braver Angels—I hope to emulate his approach. His book is a great resource for doing that!

Ruth Littmann Ashkenazi, Member of Braver Angels


This book offers a much-needed bridge to heal the many divides we see in the world today through a novel awe-based approach. Kirk Schneider is one of my favorite existential-humanistic psychologists, and when he offers spiritual and humanitarian guidance, I listen.

Scott Barry Kaufman, PhD, author of Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization, host of The Psychology Podcast


Drawing on his life’s work in healing divisions in the soul through awe-based therapy, Kirk Schneider offers crisp, practical guidelines for anyone who wants to use awe-based dialogue to bind the divisions polarizing our families, communities, and politics. This gem of a book will help us learn how to heal our social wounds, and revitalize our collective soul.

Robert Kramer, PhD, author of The Birth of Relationship Therapy: Carl Rogers Meets Otto Rank, organizational consultant, visiting professor of social psychology at Corvinus University of Budapest 


Kirk Schneider succinctly describes healthy communication processes that effectively diffuse polarizing differences while inspiring intellectual curiosity, empathy, compassion, and hope for a better tomorrow. Through structured, safe, and mindful communication formats, readers will discover how participants can unpack differences, focus on commonalities, and relinquish fear and anger associated with personal and group stereotypes, identity politics, myths, and other important issues. This book lays out a cogent vision of virtuous dialogue possibilities that could be broadly used within divisive political processes, schools, religious settings, and other institutions, as well as a means to bridge the divides with historically marginalized communities. The author provides relevant examples, including one involving a police officer that provides a future framework for law enforcement agencies to participate with their most vocal critics. The Depolarizing of America plants the seeds to break down many of the differences separating people today.

Jason Jones, a police professional and criminal justice educator based in Portland, Oregon.


When we know that alienation, fueled by polarization, breeds suffering, and authentic engagement via dialogue is our only hope for healing such alienation, though we are unsure how to proceed, Kirk Schneider’s work on polarization is indeed a genuine balm.  Schneider calls us out of the privacy of the therapeutic consulting room and into global theaters where we must link arms and march together into challenges of pandemic viruses, sustainability, global warming, extreme and persistent poverty and violence, trafficking, starvation, the degradation of animal and plant kin,  just to clear our throats.  But we will quickly halt in our tracks with any and all of these challenges unless we see and address polarization. This book, therefore, is necessary for our survival, and is, finally, a concrete pathway into democracy with so much more substance than the typical, vapid clucking so often offered by political rhetoric. Bravo!

Todd DuBose, PhD, Faculty, Chicago School of Professional Psychology


I’ve had the pleasure of participating in a handful of Experiential Democracy workshops, including one shared in this book, and they have been, without doubt, some of the more transformative experiences I have had. In this time of extreme polarization, it is easy to hunker down on our “sides” but much harder to reach across the divide. Experiential democracy and the ideas presented in this timely work are the tools we can use to begin to heal the divide in our world. When we are able to hold both our humanity and others, our ability to sit with complicated differences becomes that much easier. When we stop seeing the other as “other” but rather as a human being, we can hold space with kindness and dignity, even if we fundamentally disagree. This book is a timely read for anyone who wants to have, or facilitate, difficult conversations around the issues of our time.

Lisa Vallejos, PhD, Chair, Rocky Mountain Humanistic Counseling and Psychological Association;
co-founder, The Humanitarian Alliance


As I write this emphatic endorsement of Dr. Schneider’s new work, a world-wide pandemic is raging all around us. The rapidly changing conditions experienced due to this viral outbreak have fueled the fires of epidemics long simmering underneath this plague in America: the epidemics of poverty, health disparities, inequity, racism, and profound othering. How does one hope in such uncertainty and violence? We hope wisely and to do so calls one to engage radical imagination, an embrace of the unknown and a skilled mentor. Kirk Schneider has been a powerful mentor to many. This new book, The Depoloarizing of America, offers a brilliant invitation to Wise Hope and Social Healing in our troubled times.

Gina Subia Belton, PhD, Psychology professor at Saybrook University,
Thanatologist, Existential Medicine

The Depolarizing of America is also available on:

Amazon Kindle

Apple iBooks

Banres & Noble Nook

Google Play

The Depolarizing of America is available in audiobook at:

Apple iBooks

Audible

Amazon

Published: June 15, 2020
Pages: 98
ISBN (print): 978-1-939686-63-3
ISBN (ebook): 978-1-939686-64-0

PREFACE

INTRODUCTION: THE AWE FOR LIFE AS A BASIS FOR DEMOCRACY, DIALOGUE, AND RENEWAL

CHAPTER 1: MY AWE-BASED PATH TO DIALOGUE

CHAPTER II: DIALOGUE GROUPS FOR EVERYDAY PEOPLE

The Experiential Democracy Dialogue for Everyday People (Friends, Families, and Neighbors)

CHAPTER III: THE EXPERIENTIAL DEMOCRACY DIALOGUE FOR SCHOOLS AND CLASSROOMS

CHAPTER IV: THE EXPERIENTIAL DEMOCRACY DIALOGUE WITH PROFESSIONAL FACILITATION

Illustration: An Experiential Democracy Dialogue on Community
Policing

A Therapeutic Application of the Experiential Democracy Dialogue

Going Deep: An Intimate Excursion into the Polarized Mind

The Experiential Democracy Dialogue for Politicians and Diplomats

CHAPTER V: THE BRAVER ANGELS APPROACH: A THUMBNAIL SKETCH

CONCLUSION: WE HAVE MORE IN COMMON THAN WE THINK

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